Article provided by PathFinders
It’s February – commonly known as the month of love and romance. Whether you are in a relationship, or seeking one, do you know what a healthy relationship looks like?
Being showered with attention and affection by someone you just met is both flattering and exciting. But have you really taken the time to get to know him before taking the relationship to the next level?
Online dating is an increasingly popular way to find a soulmate. What should you be aware of? And when that big day comes for you to finally meet the person you have been connecting with for months, what do you need to be mindful of?
Here are 3 love and relationship tips all women need to know.
1. Love Doesn’t Hurt.
Healthy relationships make you feel good about yourself. It’s not always immediately clear if a relationship is unhealthy or abusive. Learn to recognise the signs. Some signs include:
- Your partner tries to control where you go and who you see; and gets angry when you don’t do as he says.
- He harms or threatens to harm you or the people you love.
- He frequently puts you down, and blames you for the problems in your relationship.
- He pushes, hits, makes you have sex or do things you don’t want to do.
You deserve to be safe in your relationship. Always remember that physical, emotional or verbal abuse is not your fault or acceptable. Sexual activity without consent is considered rape or sexual assault. Consent means agreeing to be sexual with someone, and letting the person know that sex is wanted. No means no!
Think through what you want in a relationship. A few must-haves in a healthy relationship are trust, respect, honesty and support. You deserve all these and more!
2. Love Doesn’t Manipulate.
You may find being away from home and the support of family and loved ones lonely and isolating. Some turn to online dating to find love and companionship. Some may fall quickly for someone that showers them with attention, online or otherwise.
Sadly many women, including foreign domestic workers, fall prey to love scams. Scammers may seek out foreign domestic workers in a number of ways. For instance, by befriending workers on their day off and by pretending to look for romantic partners online with fake profiles.
It is always wise to find out more about the person you just met, before you trust them with your finances and/or engage in sexual activity. People may not always be who they appear or claim to be.
If you are not comfortable to engage with someone further emotionally and/or ready to be involved with them sexually always know you can say no and walk away.
Carefully consider what you want in a partner. Don’t settle out of loneliness or peer pressure. Be honest with yourself. Trust your instinct and gut feelings. Speak with a trusted friend or family member who can give you wise support and advice.
3. Love Empowers.
A healthy and fulfilling relationship goes beyond physical attraction and saying “I Love You”. Both parties in a relationship need to put in effort to communicate, discuss aspirations and set life goals together.
Being involved in a sexual relationship is not necessarily the same as being in a loving relationship. True love inspires you to commit to your partner and plan ahead. One key discussion concerns planning to have a family. If both you and your partner want to have a baby, have an honest conversation about the best possible timeframe. If you and your partner are not ready to be parents, use contraception.
There are a number of contraceptive methods available. More information can be found on The Family Planning Association of Hong Kong’s website: https://www.famplan.org.hk/en/health-info/contraceptive-methods/
You can reach out to PathFinders for more information and support if you are pregnant or planning to be pregnant in Hong Kong.
If you have been raped or sexually assaulted, make a police report at your nearest police station or call 999.
If you are in an abusive relationship, you can seek help from:
- Hotline: 2375 5322
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Website: https://rainlily.org.hk/eng
- Hotline: 2522 0434
- Email: email@example.com
- Website: www.harmonyhousehk.org/eng
If you suspect you have been scammed, you can contact:
Anti-Deception Coordination Centre (By HK Police)
- Anti-Scam Helpline: 18222
- Website: https://www.police.gov.hk/ppp_en/04_crime_matters/adcc/contact.html
HELP for Domestic Workers
- Contact Number: 2523 4020
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Website: https://helpfordomesticworkers.org/en/home/
Mission for Migrant Workers
- Contact Number: 2522 8564
- Email: email@example.com
- Website: https://www.migrants.net/
- Contact Number: 2386 5811
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Website: https://enrichhk.org/
Caritas – Asian Migrant Workers Social Service Project (AMP)
- Hotline: 2977 5997
- Enquiry: 2147 5988 / 5497 2899